"My Coming Out Story" - Lottie

At age 11, I remember watching the film Titanic, and realising that I thought Kate Winslet (the actress who played Rose) was quite attractive. Like, really attractive. I realised I had my first celebrity crush! In early secondary school, my group of friends were discussing celebrity crushes, and I noticed that every other girl in my group of friends had a male celebrity crush, along the lines of the boys in One Direction, and Justin Bieber. So, I lied to them and said that I fancied some random teen actor in the latest chick flick. I then went home and googled 'What does it mean if I have a crush on a female?' and that's when I found my answer.


Fast forward to age 13, I was certain I was bisexual. I knew it. All the conflicting thoughts about whether it was 'just a phase' (for the record, I hate that phrase), or whether I was just a bit confused. But all that had finally worked out and life was peachy. But now there was another problem- when, who and how should I tell people. At that point i was tired of suppressing who I was, but there were so many 'problems' I could see if I told people. Am I too young to make that announcement? Will people judge me? Will I lose friends? Will my parents still accept me? These thoughts bubbled away in my mind, stressing me out. Until one day, I decided to tell my friends. So, one day, I gathered my friends in the playground and i told them. And nothing changed. A couple hugs, a few congratulations and that was that. No friends left, and no one viewed me differently. Everything was great.

I didn't tell my parents then. That was an active choice that I made not to tell them. And, initially, I regretted that. But now (age 17) i'm glad i didn't tell them then. I wasn't ashamed of being bisexual, that wasn't the problem, the problem was that i didn't know how to tell them. My dad, whilst not homophobic, isn’t the most accepting man ever, and if I wasn’t comfortable standing up for myself and who I am, then it would have been a train wreck.

So, fast forward to age 16, it’s a warm summers day and I’m relaxing in the garden with my mum and grandparents. Suddenly, I decide now is the right time. I sat them down and said ‘Mum, Nannie, Grandad, I’m bisexual, which means I’m attracted to both males and females. I’m still your grand/daughter, and I’m no different than I was 5 seconds ago before I told you’. My Nannie gave me the biggest hug and said ‘sweetheart, I might not completely understand who you do and don’t like, but I love you no matter what’. And all of a sudden, I felt free, like I was no longer tethered to anything, that I was no longer suppressing who I was. I decided to text my dad the news rather than confront him about it, and it went well but we don’t really speak about it anymore.

Now, at age 17, I’m living my best life as a (masc) bisexual, and am at college studying for my A Levels, working towards joining the Army. I am no more or less than anyone else, and I am just as worthy. Thank you for reading my story, and just remember that whether you decide to label yourself or not, that you deserve happiness and joy. Thank you🧡

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